The trough of stupidity, where you definitely get more for less

19_november_2015A letter a day to number 10. No 1,260

Thursday 19 November 2015.

Dear Mr Cameron,

I see that you’ve been campaigning again, this time lobbying against police cuts in your local Constituency of Oxfordshire (again). Well done champ, you’ve achieved the unenviable position of Britain’s most ridiculous hypocrite. I appreciate that you are in a very difficult position. How is a bloke born to privilege and every advantage in life supposed to know anything about austerity and cuts? It must be very disconcerting to discover that austerity and cuts have consequences in real life, even though, in real life, you remain utterly divorced from them and clueless about them.

Just this week in PMQs you said, ‘What I said to my local council is what I say to every council – that you’ve got to get more for less, not less for more’. In your ‘Smarter State’ speech you also said, ‘But what we are showing is that deficit reduction and an opportunity society are not alternatives. They can complement each other. Because with a smarter state, we can spend less and deliver more’. I am very sorry to have to tell you this but you are not showing that ‘deficit reduction and an opportunity society are not alternatives’, what you are showing is that your words mean nothing because you haven’t got a clue what you’re talking about.

The only bloke I know who really knew how to do more with less was Jesus, all you’ve got going for you is PR and you’re not even very good at that.

In a riposte to the claims of you being hypocritical a spokes person from your office said you want to ‘see local authorities and the police making sensible savings through back office efficiencies and joint working’. In your utter disdain and contempt for everyone not of your class, does it never occur to you that such savings, sensible or otherwise, are precisely where they would have started. The idea that the police would start cutting on the front line is so ludicrous as to be positively demented.

It is reported that the police have lost (to cuts, not their carelessness) more than 36,000 police personnel since 2010 and yet are deploying more of those left onto the front line even though that still means fewer numbers on the street. They’ve been doing exactly what you are whinging about, although, naturally, way ahead of you in their attempts to minimise the impact to the public.

I said yesterday that science will never cure stupid but that shouldn’t stop you getting an honorary degree in it.

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